What guides you in your life? Are you looking for friends? Are you wanting that special someone that is "the one"? In our lives we have people that we call family, people that we call friends, and people that we say we love. These relationships are not always solid and some are never forever.
Think about family. We have the family that we are born into. Sometimes we are lucky to have people who truly love us. I always hear that children need to grow up with a mother and a father. That is not always the case. Some of us did just fine with one parent. I was raised with love and support, and my mother was my biggest advocate. Family can also be people that we meet, with no blood relation involved.
This brings us to friends. So friends can be family, when you don't want the family you were born into. I can say I got lucky and I have a great family through my mother and aunt. But I also have other people that I would not get through my life without. They may not be blood, but to me they are family. They are my ride or die girls. The problem with friends though, is sometimes they walk away. My three girls are not the friends I had in school. I had a friend that I met when I was 5 years old. As we got older, we were always together. In high school she started to branch off and do her own thing. That was fine, I was too. The problems came after high school. And now, she does not want me around the people in her life because they don't know the things she did. I do know, so she keeps me at arm's length.
The third group was people that we love. Sometimes we love someone and they are nothing more than a friend, and that is ok. You hear people talking about the "friend zone" but really that person is saying they feel like they can trust you. Yes, you might have had feelings for them, but see you as a safe person. That can hurt, but it can also be a compliment. We don't get many safe people in our lives. I think that in any relationship that could become a romantic one, you need to take your time. So become that friend, be in that zone. If it is meant to be, you will move from that zone into the position you want. If it's not meant to be, remember they still consider you a safe place.
I think we take love for granted at times. When we meet someone, we start building that connection. Sometimes you get those massive sparks and you think this is it, the one, your forever. And when those sparks die out and you have to face the realness of a relationship, that is when people start to look for that high again. These people seem to think that they will find a forever that is always those sparks. I can tell you that is not how forever works. In the best relationships, you have the good and the bad.
I personally love when you can have the good and the bad. It lets you know if that person is really going to be there for you when things are not all rainbows and unicorns. When life is shoveling shit on you, the person who is there to help uncover you is the real one. Not just someone who makes you feel all giddy when you first meet them. And if that person can still give you those butterflies in your stomach, that is a plus. It's like sex, it's a perk, it's not what makes a relationship. I want the real, I will always want the real. I want to know that when my depression comes out or my anxiety is spiking, that someone will be there to hold my hand and get me pizza.
No comments:
Post a Comment